Focusing on Yourself?

*   I want to thank  Caroline Gavin for graciously allowing me to be a guest on her podcast show- BlogTalk Radio, Purposeful Pathway on February 27th. I  enjoyed our chat and look forward to speaking with you again!
You may replay the show here.

I often write about doing something meaningful that matters. Sometimes it’s about making a connection, rescuing a life or just helping someone out. Many times it’s about treating people with respect and dignity or just providing inspiration. It should be easy to look around and see scores of people in need of help.

But lately I hit a wall. For some reason, I had absolutely nothing to write about. I understand writers block and have always managed to write my way out of the funk. But this time things were different.

Last night it hit me. My life has changed dramatically after being laid-off a month ago. No more days at work witnessing the daily grind of usual nonsense and being instantly inspired by the next blog topic to address. Am I going through some sort-of post work depression or has it just finally hit me I am not going back to that former life of nearly 32 years?

Why do I feel such a deep sense of aloneness? Perhaps I suffered a mini-stroke in my sleep and the writing side of my brain is not functioning properly? Years ago, I gave up alcohol and drugs and attempted to fill the void with a job. Yes sir, I would make something of myself.

People liked me; I was young and thought if I bought into the corporate package it would lead me to where I belonged. Over the years, I slowly saw the corporate dream dissipate. I discovered “doing the right thing” didn’t matter to those people. Never mind your conscience, it’s all about the latest fad, slogan or mantra.

Phooey!

I realized I was just a “cog for the system” which opened the door and led me to think otherwise. That’s the day I became wide-awake. There was no turning back.

Once you realize you are unable to make an impact you’re spinning your wheels and headed nowhere. So I took the supposed “safe” route and laid-low to maintain my job, until one day the system recognized my age, blogging and supporting my wife’s unemployment hearing wasn’t in their best interests. Thus, conveniently my job was eliminated too.

Hugh MacLeod says everyone needs an “evil plan.” Well not really “evil” in the true sense of the word; just to the point of jumping out of the insanity of living paycheck to paycheck to survive into the position of doing something that really matters. My former employer made that dream a reality for me.

So maybe I’ve been feeling sorry for myself. I finally have the freedom to negotiate my own future; to do what I choose to do. How many people get to go live their dream? When you focus on yourself your world shrinks.

I also realized I have the perfect storm for writing, making decisions on what ventures to pursue and certainly the time it requires to make things happen. Creativity is best served with the least amount of distractions. For a writer, the quiet time of peace is a blessing. What more could I ask in order to do something meaningful that matters?

Until We Meet Again,
 Jim Carver

Author: The Legacy of David A. Wells- The Lexington High School “Band of Gold”
Something Meaningful that Matters!
www.successthroughmusic.com

http://jimcarver.blogspot.com/

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